The Angry Minute 4-20-01
The essentially self appointed Earth Day occurs Sunday, whereas thousands of attendees get to pat themselves on the back for NOT polluting anymore. While the thought and practice of recycling trash garners as much functionality as the tank on the back of your toilet, somehow putting the Recyclables out on the curb has become the equivalent to getting a tax audit by your trash collector.
I remember when recycling held a certain badge of honor, and when you'd carry your glass bottles to the curb, people would smile and give the head nod of approval as if you'd just saved another whale… NOW, it's a demeaning finger-point back to the house because you didn't separate the wax film from the walls of the milk carton.
How dare they! I'm recycling, you're lucky I care enough to sort my thoughts from my actions, or I'd be booby trapping my newspapers with magazines!
I mean what's the problem? You figure, you buy a case of pop, you should be able to store the cans in the original case they came in, and then put out for recycling…?!? No. You have to place the cans in a plain brown paper bag, and destroy the cardboard box they came in. No gift wrapping, no plastic baggies, no rubber bands, NOT EVEN paper plates! Try putting Doughnut boxes or popcorn boxes out on the curb and you'll get a big fat yellow slip stating EXACTLY where to pay the fine because you decided to help the environment.
I'll have a happy Earth Day…explaining to my son when he asks why Daddy doesn't recycle: The Tree huggers got greedy son…the tree huggers got greedy…
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