Date: Sun, 26 Apr 1998 16:00:46 EDT
From: SUMLIN <SUMLIN@AOL.COM>
Subject: Cussing & Social Sentences (beg of Soc Stories)
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In a message dated 98-04-26 12:44:05 EDT, you write:
<< We have a new problem one of many but this one even the
teacher hasn't a clue on. My child has picked up a new word yeah!
Unfortunately it is a four letter word very clear to all and used both
apropriately and in self talk it is probably unfortunately the one word
he uses most at the moment. The word is F----! great intonation but
uug we have to stop this. Does anyone have any ideas on how to
remove this word from my childs vocabulary he does not seen to
understand cuss words are not ok. How do we stop this at this
point I don't want to discourage a child from expressing words he
uses about 70 words expressively and the list is growing but he will
have to be removed from mainstreaming if it doesn't stop which he
really enjoys. Any ideas I'm lost!>>
Dear Laurie & Dennis:
You may want to try something called "resistance training". We had
to do this only a couple of times and our consultant advised us to use
it sparingly (if at all) as a technique. We were also instructed NOT
to have our therapists do this and that only we, the parents, should.
Here's how it goes:
SD: "Say F____"
R: "F____"
Your response: "No"
SD: "Say F____"
R: "F____"
Your response: "No"
Do this over and over until your child doesn't say the word and then
give him an immediate "go play" with heavy reinforcement. I wouldn't
go directly to a verbal imitation drill right after this. If he ever uses the
"F -- word" in a response, "no" it. Since you're targeting just that word,
it shouldn't interfere with other language acquisition.
Jim
Drill: SOCIAL SENTENCES (aka Social Stories)
These was used during the first few weeks of doing SOCIAL
STORIES. After that they looked more like "stories" than
"sentences". For examples of the "stories", including how we
used them, and more about the "Help Me Be Good" book series
by Grolier, about which a wonderfully written review was posted
the other day by Beth Curry, send an email to:
Listserv@listserv.iupui.edu.
Put in ANYTHING as the "subject" (just to fill it out), & type only....
GETPOST ME-LIST 20307 20331 21989 22107
....in the body portion of the email.
Hope this info is helpful -- megan
Drill: SOCIAL SENTENCES
[This graph was written in a tiny print font type]
WK 4/17 WK 4/24 WK 5/1....WK 6/26
________________________________
TIME OUT I_____I_____I_____I_____I_____I_____l
NO ANSWER
>FROM OTHERS
ASKING ?s
U KNOW ANS
OTHER'S
PROPERTY
CIRCLE
TIME
ETC., ETC [the others below were in the graph]
SOCIAL SENTENCES
1. TIME OUT - Sometimes grown-ups send me to a timeout
when I don't listen.
* What are you supposed to do in a timeout?
* What do grown-ups think if you don't listen?
A: They think I don't know how to listen.
* I can control myself so I don't get timeouts.
* I can listen to grown-ups.
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS - Sometimes people don't answer
when you talk to them.
* Maybe they didn't hear you.
* Maybe they weren't paying attention.
* Maybe they were busy.
* Maybe they just didn't want to talk to you.
* It's not my job to make people answer me.
* I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me later.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO - It's not good to
ask questions that I know the answer to.
* It's boring to others.
* People might think I can't remember the answers.
* People might think I'm dumb.
* People might think I'm testing them & that will make them
feel angry.
* If I want to talk to someone I can ask a question that I
don't know the answer to.
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY - I should not touch other
people's things.
* I might break it & that would upset people and make them
get mad at me.
* If someone did that to me I'd be upset.
* When [brother] takes my toys, I worry he'll break them.
* [Brother] does it because babies don't know better.
* I know better; I can remember not to touch people's things.
5. CIRCLE TIME - In circle time I listen to the teacher.
* If I talk to the other kids, the teacher will be upset because
I'm not paying attention to her.
* The other kids might think I'm a bad boy who doesn't listen
to rules.
* When I listen to the teacher, I learn.
* Learning is fun, I can remember to listen to the teacher.
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY - I talk to the kids that I'm playing with.
* It's important not to talk to kids playing with other kids.
* If I talk to kids playing other games, my friends will be sad;
they'll think I'm ignoring them.
* They might not want to play with me next time.
* If I only talk to my friends we have fun together.
* Next time they'll play with me again.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE - I only think about what people are
saying or doing.
* When I remember to do this, I make friends and I know
what's going on.
* If I think about other things I can get distracted;
I might even get stuck.
* People will think I'm weird and they won't want to play w/me.
* I will always think about what people are saying and doing.
8. PREDICTING - I should not try to guess what's going to
happen later.
* Surprises are fun
* If I try to guess, I miss out on good things.
* I might even miss a surprise.
* I'll remember not to predict.
9. CALLING OUT - Whenever I want to talk to someone, I need to
walk over & speak to them.
* That's the polite thing to do.
* When people call out, they disrupt the whole room; everyone
gets distracted.
* If I call out, people might think I don't understand the way
to do things.
* I'll be able to walk over to people when I want to talk to them.
10. NOT LISTENING - It's important to look at people and stop what
I'm doing when they have something to tell me.
* Sometimes grown-ups tell me very important things that I
need to know.
* If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and
make the grown-ups angry.
* I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when
grown-ups want me to listen.
* I will listen to grown-ups when they talk to me.
11. RULES - I'm not allowed to make up rules.
* Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
* Children don't know how to make up rules; they make up
silly rules.
* I can learn a lot from the rules grown-ups make.
* If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
* They will think I'm trying to boss them around.
* I'll act like a little boy, that's what I am.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS - When a
grown-up calls me I need to imediately stop what I'm doing
and go to them.
* They might have something to tell me that I need to know
right away.
* If I don't go right away I won't hear what I need to know.
* Grown-ups don't like children who don't listen.
* I will listen to grown-ups.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS - When I'm walking someplace I need
to look everywhere in front of me.
* That's important for everyone's safety.
* If I don't look, I might step on something and break it.
* I might trip and hurt myself.
* I might bump into someone or something.
* I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look
where I'm going.
14. INTERRUPTING - I can't interrupt when others are having a
conversation or are busy with something.
* It's not polite
* If it's extremely important, I can tap the person on the
shoulder and say excuse me, otherwise I must be patient
and wait until they're finished.
* Interrupting makes people angry because you stop them from
talking & they might forget what they were talking about.
[later when he'd get stuck b/c he'd forgot, I'd have to tell him
that my mom, his grandma, would say "then it's not that
important and he'd say...but you said....]
* Everyone deserves to talk without being interrupted.
* Grown-ups like polite children
* They're especially proud of children who do not interrupt.
* Sometimes I might think it's important and the grown-up will tell
me it's not. If that happens, I need to wait patiently.
15. PERSONAL SPACE - When I talk to people I need to give them
their space and stay away from their faces.
* When people come too close it makes other people
uncomfortable.
* Everybody needs space.
* When I make people uncomfortable, they want to get away
from me.
* They might not want to ever talk to me again.
* When I give people enough space, I get to play with and
talk to people, I make friends and have fun.
16. WALKING FROM CONVERSATION - I never turn away from
anyone when I'm in a conversation.
* Looking at people is an important part of talking to them.
* If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
* They will think I don't care about them.
* It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when
you're not looking at them.
* People like me better when I look at them, it makes them
want to talk to me more.
* I promise to look at everyone who talks to me.
* I want to be a good friend.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME - It's important to listen to
grown-ups the first time.
* Grown-ups know when I'm getting stuck.
* I can't always tell them about myself.
* The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a
second.
* When I listen, grown-ups are proud of me and I'm proud of
myself.
* If I don't listen grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't
know how to listen.
* Big boys listen the first time.
* I'm a big boy.
18. TASK LAZINESS/DOING BEST - It's important to do my best in
everything I do.
* I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
* When I do my best, I'm really proud of myself and other people
say good things about my work.
* Doing my best means ________ (pressing hard, doing it
quietly, coloring in the lines...).
* When I don't do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
* Lazy people finish things last, miss things and lose games.
[Much later, when he rushed through things because
we impacted on him in pushing for more competitiveness,
we had to change these things around again -- it's not
who finished FIRST...it's who does the best job, etc.]
* People aren't proud of other people when they don't try their
best.
* I'll always try to do my best and work hard, that way I'll get the
most out of everything.
19. I MUST TALK - Sometimes I want to say things very badly, it feels
like I have to say it right that second.
* It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
* Even though it feels important, it can wait.
* They will listen to me better if I wait patiently.
* When I interrupt, it just angers people.
* People wonder, "what's wrong with him?", "why can't he wait?"
* If I can wait, I can tell them later.
Date: Sun, 17 May 1998 11:46:54 EDT
From: SUMLIN <SUMLIN@AOL.COM>
Subject: Orig Social Sentences (Stories)
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Social Stories:
Although there may be a few repeats in the posts we'll be sending,
most of the time there will be slight differences in stories w/the same
name (i.e., all SS Origs 1, 2, 3 & Masters look the same, but there
are differences in the wording of the stories within each letter under
those). We did this b/c we realized right from the start that our son was
memorizing the words too well and would criticize us if we'd change
any of them in the slightest. They were kept unpredictable in this way
and it helped him key into the words and what they meant instead of
whether or not WE were doing them correctly.
Even if all of this is confusing (it is to me as well), if you have a child
who
is ready, I hope that you could glean from these since so many of the
"residual" problems these kids have seem, at least from correspondence
we've had with parents, to be fairly universal.
The graph sheets at the beg of some of the series were for check
off/initialing by therapists (so we could keep track that they're all
getting done and sometimes could assign specific ones that weren't
worked on enough within the notes). This was in a small print font.
In notes (looseleaf sheets after the graph -- we'll send these later)
they'd write which "set" (a, b, or c) of the story we were currently
using (SS-Originals, 1, 2, 3, or Master) that they'd used, though the
graph was the same no matter which letter they were using. We of
course preferred that whoever was there did not use the same "set"
the previous therapist did.
[abbreviated version of the graph we used]
WK 4/17 WK 4/24 WK 5/1 thru WK 6/26
1. TIME OUT I I I I
I_______I_______I________I
2. NO ANS I I I I
FROM OTHERS I_______I_______I________I
3. ASKING ?s U I I I I
KNOW ANS TO I_______I_______I________I
4. OTHER'S
PROPERTY thru 19.
SOCIAL SENTENCES
1. TIME OUT - Sometimes grown-ups send me to a timeout when
I don't listen.
* What are you supposed to do in a timeout?
* What do grown-ups think if you don't listen?
A: They think I don't know how to listen.
* I can control myself so I don't get timeouts
* I can listen to grown-ups
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS - Sometimes people don't answer
when you talk to them
* Maybe they didn't hear you.
* Maybe they weren't paying attention.
* Maybe they were busy.
* Maybe they just didn't want to talk to you.
* It's not my job to make people answer me.
* I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me
later.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO - It's not good to ask
questions that I know the answer to.
* It's boring to others.
* People might think I can't remember the answers.
* People might think I'm dumb.
* People might think I'm testing them & that will
make them feel angry.
* If I want to talk to someone I can ask a question
that I don't know the answer to.
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY - I should not touch other
people's things.
* I might break it & that would upset people and make them mad
at me.
* If someone did that to me I'd be upset.
* When [brother] takes my toys, I worry he'll break them.
* [Brother] does it because babies don't know better.
* I know better; I can remember not to touch people's things.
5. CIRCLE TIME - In circle time I listen to the teacher.
* If I talk to the other kids, the teacher will be upset because
I'm not paying attention to her.
* The other kids might think I'm a bad boy who doesn't listen
to rules.
* When I listen to the teacher, I learn.
* Learning is fun; I can remember to listen to the teacher.
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY - I talk to the kids that I'm playing with.
* It's important not to talk to kids playing with other kids
* If I talk to kids playing other games, my friends will be sad,
they'll think I'm ignoring them.
* They might not want to play with me next time.
* If I only talk to my friends we have fun together
* Next time they'll play with me again.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE - I only think about what people are
saying or doing.
* When I remember to do this, I make friends and I know what's
going on.
* If I think about other things I can get distracted, I might even
get stuck.
* People will think I'm weird and they won't want to play with me.
* I will always think about what people are saying and doing.
8. PREDICTING - I should not try to guess what's going to happen later
* Surprises are fun.
* If I try to guess, I miss out on good things.
* I might even miss a surprise.
* I'll remember not to predict.
9. CALLING OUT - Whenever I want to talk to someone, I need to walk
over & speak to them.
* That's the polite thing to do.
* When people call out, they disrupt the whole room; everyone
gets distracted.
* If I call out, people might think I don't understand the way to
do things.
* I'll be able to walk over to people when I want to talk to them.
10. NOT LISTENING - It's important to look at people and stop what
I'm doing when they have something to tell me.
* Sometimes grown-ups tell me very important things that I need
to know.
* If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and
make the grown-ups angry.
* I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups
want me to listen.
* I will listen to grown-ups when they talk to me.
11. RULES - I'm not allowed to make up rules.
* Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
* Children don't know how to make up rules; they make up
silly rules.
* I can learn a lot from the rules grown-ups make.
* If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
* They will think I'm trying to boss them around.
* I'll act like a little boy, that's what I am.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS - When a
grown-up calls me I need to immediately stop what I'm doing and
go to them.
* They might have something to tell me that I need to know
right away.
* If I don't go right away I won't hear what I need to know.
* Grown-ups don't like children who don't listen.
* I will listen to grown-ups.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS - When I'm walking someplace I need to
look everywhere in front of me.
* That's important for everyone's safety.
* If I don't look, I might step on something and break it.
* I might trip and hurt myself.
* I might bump into someone or something.
* I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look
where I'm going.
14. INTERRUPTING - I can't interrupt when others are having a
conversation or are busy with something.
* It's not polite
* If it's extremely important, I can tap the person on the
shoulder and say excuse me, otherwise I must be patient
and wait until they're finished.
* Interrupting makes people angry because you stop them from
talking and they might forget what they were talking about.
* Everyone deserves to talk without being interrupted.
* Grown-ups like polite children
* They're especially proud of children who do not interrupt.
* Sometimes I might think it's important and the grown-up will tell
me it's not. If that happens, I need to wait patiently.
15. PERSONAL SPACE - When I talk to people I need to give them
their space and stay away from their faces.
* When people come too close it makes other people
uncomfortable.
* Everybody needs space.
* When I make people uncomfortable, they want to get away
from me.
* They might not want to ever talk to me again.
* When I give people enough space, I get to play with and talk
to people, I make friends and have fun.
16. WALKING FROM CONVERSATION - I never turn away from
anyone when I'm in a conversation.
* Looking at people is an important part of talking to them.
* If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
* They will think I don't care about them.
* It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when
you're not looking at them.
* People like me better when I look at them, it makes them want
to talk to me more.
* I promise to look at everyone who talks to me.
* I want to be a good friend.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME - It's important to listen to grown-ups
the first time.
* Grown-ups know when I'm getting stuck.
* I can't always tell them about myself.
* The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for
a second.
* When I listen, grown-ups are proud of me and I'm proud
of myself.
* If I don't listen grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't
know how to listen.
* Big boys listen the first time.
* I'm a big boy.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST - It's important to do my best
in everything I do.
* I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
* When I do my best, I'm really proud of myself and other people
say good things about my work.
* Doing my best means ________ (pressing hard, doing it
quietly, coloring in the lines...)
* When I don't do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
* Lazy people finish things last, miss things and lose games.
* People aren't proud of other people when they don't try their
best.
* I'll always try to do my best and work hard, that way I'll get
the most out of everything.
19. I MUST TALK - Sometimes I want to say things very badly, it
feels like I have to say it right that second.
* It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
* Even though it feels important, it can wait.
* They will listen to me better if I wait patiently.
* When I interrupt, it just angers people.
* People wonder, "what's wrong with him?", "why can't he wait?"
* If I can wait, I can tell them later.
------------------------------
Date: Sun, 17 May 1998 11:48:14 EDT
From: SUMLIN <SUMLIN@AOL.COM>
Subject: Social Stories 1a & 1b
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Responsibility for posts to this list lies entirely with the original author.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Social Stories 1a & 1b
WK 6/26 WK 7/3 WK 7/10 thru WK 9/4
1. NO ANSWER I I I I
OTHERS I_______I_______I_______I
2. WAITING I I I I
YOUR TURN I_______I_______I_______I
3. NOT I I I I
LISTENING I_______I_______I_______I
4. OTHERS I I I I
PROPERTY I_______I_______I_______I
5. LEAVING
ACTIVITY, etc. thru 24.
S O C I A L S T O R I E S #1A
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
I like talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
Sometimes they don't answer when I talk to them.
Maybe they didn't hear me or maybe they weren't paying attention
Maybe they were busy or maybe they just didn't want to talk to me.
It's not my job to make people answer me.
I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me later.
2. WAITING MY TURN
I LOVE doing great work in school.
When I'm REALLY proud of what I do, I'm in a hurry to show all of
my teachers.
SOMETIMES the teacher is busy with ANOTHER child and I walk
over, stick my work in her face and say, "HERE!"
THIS makes the teacher VERY uncomfortable and annoyed and
MAD at me.
I don't blame her -- I would feel the same way if someone did that
to ME!
It would be better if I WAITED my turn and then gave it to her.
When I stand PATIENTLY and WAIT my turn, I still get to show off
my great work and nobody will be MAD at me.
I KNOW that good things happen to people who wait patiently.
I CAN wait for my turn.
3. NOT LISTENING
When people talk to me, it's usually something I need to hear.
It's important to look at people & stop what I'm doing when they have
something to tell me.
Sometimes grown-ups tell me VERY important things that I need to know.
If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and make
someone mad.
I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want
me to listen.
When people talk to me, I will STOP what I'm doing and look &
listen to them.
4. TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE OR THEIR THINGS
I should NEVER touch other people's things without asking permission
first.
I might break it and that would upset people and make them mad
at me.
NOBODY likes people who touch their property.
If someone did that to me I'd be upset.
I also shouldn't touch people in a weird way.
[Brother] does it because babies don't know any better.
But I know better and I can remember not to touch people's things
or touch them in a weird way.
5. LEAVING ACTIVITY
I LOVE playing with other kids.
I talk to the kids I'm playing with.
If I talk to kids playing other games, MY friends will be sad and think
I'm ignoring them.
They'll think I don't like them.
They might not want to play with me next time.
If I ONLY talk to my friends we'll have fun together
Next time they'll play with me again.
6. TIME-OUTS
Sometimes grown-ups send me to a time-out when I don't listen.
When I'm in a time-out, I'm VERY quiet.
I think about what I did wrong and I feel VERY sad.
I don't want anyone to think I don't know how to listen.
I CAN be good and control myself so I WON'T get time-outs.
I CAN listen to grown-ups.
7. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
It's important to sit still when I'm sitting and stand still when I'm
standing.
When I don't sit or stand still I get distracted and have trouble
following what's going on.
The other problem is that everyone else gets distracted too since
they start staring at the way I'm moving and forget to listen to me.
I hate when people don't listen to me and I know I can get them to
listen to me by staying in one place.
Even though I get excited when I talk to people, I can control myself
and stay still.
This way I'll have more friends pay attention to me.
8. BELL RINGS
I know when I'm in school there are many rules that I have to follow.
When I follow the rules in school I make my teachers proud and the
other kids know I'm a good boy.
One of the rules in my new school is that when the teacher rings
the bell, I have to stop whatever I'm doing.
When the bell rings it means the teacher has something important
to say so I know I better look at her and listen carefully.
If I'm good when the bell rings, I can earn a star.
It's easy to stop what I'm doing and listen to the teacher when
the bell rings.
That's because I know how to follow rules and listen to grown-ups.
9. MY HANDS
Sometimes I think about my hands and the weird things I can do
with them.
The problem is, I can't think about ANYTHING else when I'm playing
with my hands.
The best thing to do is to keep my hands QUIET and on my lap.
If I'm in school I can also fold them quietly.
I can NEVER pick them.
I can NEVER play with my fingers.
These are the things that make me TOTALLY stuck.
I CAN remember to keep my hands quiet on my lap.
It's NOT that hard, I CAN control myself.
When I stop thinking about my hands, I can concentrate on other things.
I'm proud when I'm NOT thinking about my hands.
10. TASK LAZINESS / DOING MY BEST
It's SO important to do my best in EVERYTHING I do.
I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
When I do my best I'm REALLY proud of myself & others say
good things about my work.
When I DON'T do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
Lazy people finish things last, miss out on things and lose games.
NOBODY'S proud of me when I don't try hard.
I'll always try to do my best and work HARD so I'll get the most out
of everything.
That will make ME very happy.
11. RULES
Rules are important for EVERYONE.
I'm not allowed to make up rules.
Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
Children don't know how to make up rules -- they make up silly rules.
I can learn A LOT from the rules grown-ups make.
If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
They'll think I'm trying to boss them around.
I won't make up rules because that's a grown-ups job.
12. EARNING STARS
One thing I love about my new school is that good boys and girls
get good things.
When I do something good in school, the teacher gives me a star.
If I stop what I'm doing and put my things away when the bell rings
I can get a star.
Helping to clean up gets me stars as long as I don't throw things
and put it away nice.
At the end of the day I can exchange my stars for good things
like stickers or candy.
Earning stars and getting stickers and candy is a special part
of my new school that I like a lot.
13. WEIRD THINGS
All the strange things I do are NOT a good idea.
People stare at me and laugh AT me (and not WITH ME) when
I act weird.
I get stuck on these things whether its my hands, my feet, my
mouth or my eyes.
Sometimes when grown-ups tell me to stop doing a weird thing,
I think of ANOTHER weird thing I can do instead.
Instead of thinking about OTHER weird things to do, I SHOULD
think of ways to be good.
When I'm GOOD I can get lots of good things.
It's hard, but I CAN do it.
14. I MUST TALK
Sometimes I want to say things VERY badly.
It feels like I HAVE to say it RIGHT THAT SECOND.
It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
Even though it FEELS important, it CAN wait.
They will listen to me BETTER if I wait patiently.
When I interrupt, it just ANGERS people.
People wonder, "what's wrong with him?" and "why can't he wait?"
If I can wait, I can STILL tell them later and EVERYONE will like
me MORE.
15. CALLING OUT
Sometimes I want to get the attention of someone who is far away.
Whenever I want to talk to someone, I need to walk over and speak
to them.
That's the polite thing to do.
When people call out, they disrupt everything and everyone
gets distracted.
If I call out, people might think I'm rude.
I KNOW how to be polite and walk over to people when I want to
talk to them.
16. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
It's IMPORTANT to listen to grown-ups the first time.
I don't know when I'm getting stuck, but grown-ups always KNOW
when I am.
I can't always talk about myself.
The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
When I listen, grown-ups are proud of me and I'M proud of myself.
If I don't listen, grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know
HOW to listen.
Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time.
I'm a big boy because I ALWAYS listen the first time.
17. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
When I'm walking someplace I need to look EVERYWHERE in front of me.
That's important for EVERYONE'S safety.
If I DON'T look, I might step on something and break it.
Something might come crashing into me and hurt me bad.
I might trip and hurt myself.
I might bump into someone or something.
I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look where I'm
going.
When I look, I can get out of the way if something dangerous is coming at me.
I'm SO proud when I remember to watch where I'm going.
18. PACING
Sometimes I do things for a VERY long time.
I know that I have to save up my energy so I don't get tired later.
I always have to pace myself and NOT get TOO wild or I will get tired
and have trouble paying attention later.
If I have trouble paying attention, my friends will think I'm ignoring them
and they will look for other people to play with.
If I stay calm and pace myself, I'll be able to do great for a VERY
long time.
19. GROWN UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
Grown-ups are in charge and make the rules and decide things.
Grown-ups have different sets of rules than kids.
They make up the rules for grown-ups and kids.
Kids never make up rules for anyone.
It seems unfair since kids can't do all the things that grown-ups can.
It's important to respect what grown-ups say and do, they know best.
I can learn a lot from grown-ups especially if I follow their rules.
20. WALKING FROM CONVERSATION
I LOVE to hear what other people have to say.
I NEVER turn away from anyone when I'm in a conversation.
Looking at people is a VERY important part of talking to them.
If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
They will think I don't care about them.
It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when you're
not looking at them.
People like me better when I look at them, it makes them WANT
to talk to me.
I promise to stay still and look at everyone who talks to me.
I'm want to be a good friend and I'm PROUD to be a good friend.
21. DAYDREAMING
I LOVE hearing what other people say and WATCHING what other
kids & people do.
When I'm with other people, I pay attention and ONLY think about
what they are saying or doing.
When I remember to do this, I'm proud to make friends and know
what's going on.
If I daydream and think about other things, I can get distracted and
might even get stuck.
People will think I'm weird and won't want to play with me.
I never daydream and ALWAYS think about what people are saying
and doing.
22. CIRCLE TIME
I like circle time because I learn and have fun at the same time.
In circle time I always listen to the teacher.
If I talk to other kids, the teacher will be upset because I'm not
paying attention to HER.
And if I DON'T pay attention to her, I might miss something fun.
Other kids may think I'm a bad boy who doesn't listen to rules.
When I listen to the teacher, I learn new things and have a GREAT time.
Learning is fun...I'm so proud to always remember to listen to the teacher.
23. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
People ask me things ALL the time.
I KNOW when someone asks me something it's because they want
me to answer.
When I DON'T answer, grown-ups and other kids might think I don't
like them.
I hate when people don't answer MY questions so I KNOW how
THEY must feel when I don't answer them.
I know I have important things to say and that's why people ask
me things.
I will ALWAYS answer EVERYONE the FIRST time so I can have lots
of friends.
24. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
Part of pacing yourself is learning to do things quickly.
Dawdling and stalling isn't good because you can finish things last.
When I finish last, I miss out on playing games with other kids.
If I take to long to join an activity I might miss something.
I'll have less time to play with other kids.
I want to be part of the group and be part of the action.
I won't stall, I'll do things quickly and always know what's going on.
I'm very proud of myself when I do things quickly
=============================
S O C I A L S T O R I E S #1B
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
I enjoy talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
They don't ALWAYS answer when I talk to them.
Maybe they weren't paying attention or they didn't hear me.
Maybe they just didn't WANT to talk to me or they were busy.
I SHOULDN'T try to FORCE people to answer me.
I can just walk away and forget about it and be happy anyway.
I'm PROUD of myself when I can just walk away.
2. WAITING MY TURN
I see people waiting on line all the time.
Sometimes I have to get on line at a store or in school.
I know that when I'm on line, I have to stay there and not wander off.
If I don't stay on line in school, other kids will think I have no self-
control.
Their parents won't want me to go to their house or to their birthday parties.
Parents don't let their children play with children who can't control
themselves and wait on a line.
If I don't stay on line in a store, my mom and dad won't buy me things
I like.
I always wait on lines patiently wherever I go.
3. NOT LISTENING
People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
I need to pay attention and hear ALL the important things that
grown-ups tell me.
If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all
my friends.
I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything & pay
attention to them.
4. TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE OR THEIR THINGS
I like to look at other people's things.
The BEST way to do this is to ask permission FIRST.
Nobody likes people who TOUCH their property without asking.
I don't like it when someone touches MY things without asking first.
I worry they might break my things if they're not careful.
When someone asks permission first, I KNOW they'll be careful
because they're acting grown-up.
Only BABIES grab things without asking first.
But I'm NOT a baby -- I ALWAYS ask before touching someone's property.
5. LEAVING ACTIVITY
I LOVE having friends!
I have GREAT conversations with the kids I play with.
I would be hurt if MY friends walked away from ME!
If I see other kids playing something else, I NEVER walk away from
my friends.
If I did walk away, I'd hurt my friends' feelings.
They would ALWAYS remember that I walked away & would NEVER
want to play with me again.
If I stay with my friends they'll always stay with me and be my friends.
6. TIME-OUT
I ALWAYS try to behave.
Sometimes when I don't listen, grown-ups send me to a time-out.
I'm VERY quiet when I'm in a time-out.
I feel VERY sad and I THINK about what I did wrong.
I want EVERYONE to think I know how to listen.
I CAN behave and control myself so I don't get time outs.
When I listen to grown-ups, everything is great!
7. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
I talk to a lot of people and a lot of people talk to me.
When I'm in a conversation it's always good to stay in one place.
When I move back and forth or figit in my chair it makes people stare
at me and stop paying attention to me.
I can forget what I was going to say and my friends will walk away
from me.
When I stand and sit still everyone pays attention to me because
there are no distractions.
I know the best way to keep my friends is to stay still when we're
talking.
8. BELL RINGS
The most important people in my classroom are my teachers.
They're important because they're the grown-ups who make the rules
in school.
Every school has different rules that children have to follow.
Sometimes in school, the teacher needs me to stop what I'm doing
and pay attention.
In my old school the rule was that when the lights flashed I had to
stop what I was doing and pay attention to the teachers.
In my new school, when the teacher rings the bell I have to stop
whatever I'm doing and pay attention.
Whenever I hear the bell that's exactly what I do because I can
earn a star for following the rules.
9. MY HANDS
There are a lot of strange things I can do with my hands.
When I look around me I notice that almost nobody else does
these things besides me.
The people who I notice that DO DO strange things with their hands
are ALL alone.
Nobody wants to be their friend because of the weird things they do.
I like having a lot of friends.
I don't want to be alone.
I CAN keep my hands in my lap when I'm sitting and at my side
when I'm standing.
10. TASK LAZINESS / DOING MY BEST
It's important to ALWAYS try hard to do my best.
I must concentrate on what I'm doing and not be distracted by anything.
When I do my best, people tell me what a GOOD job I did and I feel proud.
Lazy people don't do their best -- NO ONE likes lazy people.
Lazy people finish last -- they miss things and are losers.
I LOVE to finish first and be a winner!
I LOVE to do my best and work hard so I'll get the MOST out of
EVERYTHING and always feel happy and proud.
11. RULES
I make sure to follow rules.
ONLY grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
The rules they make help me learn how to be a better person.
I make up silly rules and get stuck & that can make a grown-up mad.
I'll let grown-ups make the rules so I can be great when I grow up.
12. EARNING STARS
In my new school the teachers reward good behavior with stars.
When I follow their rules I know I can earn a star because grown-ups
want to give good things to children who follow their rules.
One way I can earn a star is to clean up quickly and quietly when
I'm finished with something.
I can also earn stars by stopping what I'm doing and paying attention
to the teachers when the bell rings.
Getting stars makes me want to be really good and follow all the rules
and listen to all the grown-ups.
I know that at the end of the day, I can get lots of good things with
my stars.
13. WEIRD THINGS
There are A LOT of weird things I can do.
When I stop doing ONE weird thing I can ALWAYS think of another.
The only problem with this is that when I do one weird thing after
another, EVERYONE wants to get away from me.
If EVERYONE KEEPS running away from me, I'll be very lonely.
I would rather be with LOTS of people than be all alone.
I better work really hard at controlling all the weird things so I can
always have friends.
14. I MUST TALK
Sometimes I want to say things very badly and it feels like I have
to say it RIGHT that second.
It's important to control myself and WAIT until the other person is
finished talking.
People will pay MORE more attention to me if I wait my turn.
When I interrupt, it makes people very mad. I don't like it when
someone interrupts ME!
If I wait patiently, I can STILL tell them later and everyone will
like me more.
15. CALLING OUT
Sometimes I want to talk to someone who's far away.
When this happens, I NEVER yell across the room.
It's more polite to just walk over and talk to them.
Yelling across the room is rude -- it interrupts everyone else.
I'm GLAD and PROUD that I always walk over to people when I
have something to say.
16. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
I shouldn't talk back, I should just listen.
When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time.
When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's o.k.
Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
17. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
Sometimes I'm in a hurry when I walk.
When I'm walking I need to LOOK where I'm going so I don't step
on things.
When I don't look where I'm going, I could trip or bump into things.
Not looking where you're going is dangerous, something can bump
into you.
When I look where I'm going and something is coming at me,
I can duck or get out of the way.
I'm ALWAYS very careful when I walk, even if I'm in a hurry.
18. PACING
Some things I do last for a few hours.
School goes on for a few hours and so do a lot of games and sports
I play.
I like to finish EVERYTHING I start.
I'm always good when I start things but sometimes it's hard for me to
stay good for a long time.
I know if I stay good for a long time I'll get something special.
The best way to stay good for a long time is to pace myself.
Pacing means not running TOO fast or talking TOO much in the beginning.
If I pace myself when I start things, I'll probably still be good at the end.
I want to make you proud of me and me proud of me and I know the
best way is to be good for a LONG time.
19. GROWN-UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
Sometimes I see a grown-up do things that I'm not allowed to do.
It's seems unfair but I know it's OK since I realize that grown-ups
make the rules, not kids.
One day I'm going to be a grown-up and I'll be able to make rules too.
The only way I'll learn is if I follow grown-ups rules while I'm still
a kid.
When I don't follow a grown-ups rules, they get angry at me and
sometimes yell at me.
I don't like when grown-ups get mad at me.
I'm a good boy who follows all the rules that grown-ups make.
20. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
I talk to people all the time.
When I'm in a conversation, I NEVER turn away from whoever
I'm talking to.
If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
My feelings are hurt when people walk away from me when I'm
talking to them.
When I talk to people and don't look at them, they have trouble
hearing me.
I know if I STAND STILL & LOOK at whoever I'm talking to, I'll have
lots of friends.
21. DAYDREAMING
I love people MORE than anything else!
People are VERY interesting.
I ALWAYS pay careful attention to what people say and do
and NEVER daydream.
I don't WANT to miss anything so I ALWAYS look AND listen
when people are talking.
If I daydream I STOP paying attention, and I miss things.
When daydream, people have to repeat themselves.
NOBODY likes to repeat themselves.
I want to make people happy so I ALWAYS listen and look when
people are talking and doing things, I never daydream.
22. CIRCLE TIME
Circle time is FUN!
When the teacher talks, I pay close attention.
The teacher likes it when I ONLY pay attention to her & don't talk
to the other kids.
I know if I talk to the other kids, I might miss something the teacher said.
OTHER kids will be upset with me if I ruin circle time.
When I listen to the teacher, circle time is MUCH more fun!
23. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
I'm very smart so a lot of people want to ask me things.
I love it when people ask me questions because I know it means
they find me interesting.
Sometimes when grown-ups ask me things, I don't answer them
the first time.
This makes them think I'm dumb.
I get frustrated when grown-ups don't answer me the first time.
The only way ANYONE will know how smart I am is if I answer their
questions AS SOON AS I hear them.
Part of being smart is answering questions quickly.
I want everyone to know how smart I am so I will ALWAYS
answer everyone the first time.
24. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
When something is really easy to do I should do it quickly instead
of stalling.
When I get distracted and stall, everyone else moves onto the next
thing except for me.
I want to be included in what everyone else is doing.
If I take to long to finish something I know how to do, everyone will
think I don't want to do the next thing and they'll start without me.
Even if I yell, "wait for me" nobody will.
Nobody wants to wait for someone who is slow and takes a long time
to move on to the next thing.
That's why I try hard to do things quickly. I want to be a part of
everything.
S O C I A L S T O R I E S #2
1. TIME-OUT
I ALWAYS try to behave.
Sometimes when I don't listen, grown-ups send me to a time-out.
I'm VERY quiet when I'm in a time-out.
I feel VERY sad and I THINK about what I did wrong.
I want EVERYONE to think I know how to listen.
I CAN behave and control myself so I don't get time outs.
When I listen to grown-ups, everything is great!
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
I enjoy talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
They don't always answer when I talk to them.
Maybe they weren't paying attention or they didn't hear me.
Maybe they just didn't WANT to talk to me or they were busy.
I SHOULDN'T try to FORCE people to answer me.
I can just walk away and forget about it and be happy anyway.
I'm PROUD of myself when I can just walk away.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO
It's not good to ask questions that I know the answer to.
People might think I can't remember the answers or that I'm not smart.
People get bored when you talk about things we already know.
People might think I'm teasing them & that will make them mad.
I should only ask questions that I DON'T know the answer to.
That's what questions are for!
I'm VERY smart & want to learn new things, so I ONLY ask questions
I don't know the answer to.
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY
I like to look at other people's things.
The best way to do this is to ask permission first.
Nobody likes people who TOUCH their property without asking.
I don't like it when someone touches MY things without asking first.
I worry they might break my thingsif they're not careful.
When someone asks permission first, I KNOW they'll be careful
because they're acting grown-up.
Only BABIES grab things without asking first.
But I'm NOT a baby -- I ALWAYS ask before touching someone's
property.
5. CIRCLE TIME
Circle time is FUN!
When the teacher talks, I pay close attention.
The teacher likes it when I ONLY pay attention to her & don't talk to
the other kids.
I know if I talk to the other kids, I might miss something the teacher
said.
OTHER kids will be upset with me if I ruin circle time.
When I listen to the teacher, circle time is MUCH more fun!
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY
I LOVE having friends!
I have GREAT conversations with the kids I play with.
I would be hurt if MY friends walked away from ME!
If I see other kids playing something else, I NEVER walk away from
my friends.
If I did walk away, I'd hurt my friends' feelings.
They would ALWAYS remember that I walked away & would
NEVER want to play with me again.
If I stay with my friends they'll always stay with me and be my friends.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE
I love people MORE than anything else!
People are VERY interesting.
I ALWAYS pay careful attention to what people say and do.
I don't want to miss anything so I always look and listen when
people are talking.
If I stop paying attention, I will miss things.
When I DON'T pay attention, people have to repeat themselves.
NOBODY likes to repeat themselves.
I want to make people happy so I ALWAYS listen and look when
people are talking and doing things.
8. PREDICTING
I NEVER know what's going to happen later.
I know it's better to wait and see what will happen instead of trying
to guess.
If I wait, I MAY get a big surprise.
I'd hate to ruin a good surprise.
When I try to predict what will happen later people get annoyed
with me.
There's NOTHING better than a big surprise and I know if I DON'T
predict I'll get more surprises!
9. CALLING OUT
Sometimes I want to talk to someone who's far away.
When this happens, I NEVER yell across the room.
It's more polite to just walk over and talk to them.
Yelling across the room is rude -- it interrupts everyone else.
I'm GLAD and PROUD that I always walk over to people when I
have something to say.
10. NOT LISTENING
People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
I need to pay attention and hear ALL the important things that
grown-ups tell me.
If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all
my friends.
I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything & pay attention
to them.
11. RULES
I make sure to follow rules.
Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
The rules they make help me learn how to be a better person.
I make up silly rules and get stuck & that can make a grown-up mad.
I'll let grown-ups make the rules so I can be great when I grow up.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS
I like concentrating on what I'm doing.
Sometimes a grown-up calls me over when I'm busy.
When this happens, I IMMEDIATELY stop what I'm doing and walk
over to them.
I know if a grown-up calls me when I'm busy, it MUST be something
very important.
If I don't go right away, I can miss something important.
No one likes children who don't listen.
When a grown-up calls me, I stop what I'm doing and walk over
to them.
I'm SO glad that I stop what I'm doing to listen.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS
Sometimes I'm in a hurry when I walk.
When I'm walking I need to LOOK where I'm going so I don't step
on things.
When I don't look where I'm going, I could trip or bump into things.
I'm ALWAYS very careful when I walk, even if I'm in a hurry.
14. INTERRUPTING
Sometimes I see other people talking with each other.
Sometimes I notice people who are very busy with something.
When someone is busy or in a conversation with someone I
NEVER interrupt.
It's not polite to interrupt.
I can tap the person on the shoulder and say excuse me ONLY if
what I have to say is EXTREMELY important.
Even then I might have to be patient and wait longer.
People get mad when I interrupt because they can forget what they
were going to say.
NOBODY likes to be interrupted -- I don't like when people interrupt
me!
That's why I don't interrupt people -- I'm sensitive to how other
people feel.
15. PERSONAL SPACE
I love talking to people, and when I do I give them enough space.
When I talk to people TOO close they get very uncomfortable.
I don't like it when other people talk too close to MY face!
My friends like me better when I give them enough space.
I ALWAYS make sure to give people enough space when I talk
to them.
16. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
I talk to people all the time.
When I'm in a conversation, I NEVER turn away from whoever I'm
talking to.
If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
My feelings are hurt when people walk away from me when I'm talking
to them.
When I talk to people and don't look at them, they have trouble
hearing me.
I know if I STAND STILL & LOOK at whoever I'm talking to, I'll have
lots of friends.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
I shouldn't talk back, I should just listen.
When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time.
When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's o.k.
Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
It's important to ALWAYS try hard to do my best.
I must concentrate on what I'm doing and not be distracted
by anything.
When I do my best, people tell me what a GOOD job I did and I
feel proud.
Lazy people don't do their best -- NO ONE likes lazy people.
Lazy people finish last -- they miss things and are losers.
I LOVE to finish first and be a winner!
I LOVE to do my best and work hard so I'll get the MOST out of
EVERYTHING and always feel happy and proud.
19. I MUST TALK
Sometimes I want to say things very badly and it feels like I have
to say it RIGHT that second.
It's important to control myself and WAIT until the other person is
finished talking.
People will pay MORE more attention to me if I wait my turn.
When I interrupt, it makes people very mad. I don't like it when
someone interrupts ME!
If I wait patiently, I can STILL tell them later and everyone will like
me more.
20. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
I'm very smart so a lot of people want to ask me things.
I love it when people ask me questions because I know it means
they find me interesting.
Sometimes when grown-ups ask me things, I don't answer them the
first time.
This makes them think I'm dumb.
I get frustrated when grown-ups don't answer me the first time.
The only way anyone will know how smart I am is if I answer their
questions as soon as I hear them.
Part of being smart is answering questions quickly.
I want everyone to know how smart I am so I will always answer
everyone the first time.
21. PACING
Some things I do last for a few hours.
School goes on for a few hours and so do a lot of games and sports
I play.
I like to finish everything I start.
I'm always good when I start things but sometimes it's hard for me
to stay good for a long time.
I know if I stay good for a long time I'll get something special.
The best way to stay good for a long time is to pace myself.
Pacing means not running too fast or talking too much in the
beginning.
If I pace myself when I start things, I'll probably still be good at
the end.
I want to make you proud of me and I know the best way is to be
good for a long time.
22. WEIRD THINGS
There are a lot of weird things I can do.
When I stop doing one weird thing I can always think of another.
The only problem with this is that when I do one weird thing after
another, everyone wants to get away from me.
If everyone keeps running away from me, I'll be very lonely.
I would rather be with lots of people than be all alone.
I better work really hard at controlling all the weird things so I
can always have friends.
23. WAITING YOUR TURN
I see people waiting on line all the time.
Sometimes I have to get on line at a store or in school.
I know that when I'm on line, I have to stay there and not wander off.
If I don't stay on line in school, other kids will think I have no
self-control.
Their parents won't want me to go to their house or to their birthday
parties.
Parents don't let their children play with children who can't control
themselves and wait on a line.
If I don't stay on line in a store, my mom and dad won't buy me
things I like.
I always wait on lines patiently wherever I go.
24. MY HANDS
There are a lot of strange things I can do with my hands.
When I look around me I notice that almost nobody else does
these things but me.
The people who I notice that do strange things with their hands are
all alone.
Nobody wants to be their friend because of the weird things they do.
I like having a lot of friends.
I don't want to be alone.
I can keep my hands in my lap when I'm sitting and at my side when
I'm standing
S O C I A L S T O R I E S #3
1. TIME-OUT
The BEST way to make grown-ups happy is to behave.
Sometimes when I misbehave, grown-ups give me time-outs.
A time-out is a QUIET time to think about what I did wrong.
I never get mad or hit anybody in a time-out because that would
stop me from thinking about what I did and then I can't learn.
After a time-out, I've learned how to control myself & I WON'T do
the wrong thing again.
When I do the wrong behavior again, grown-ups get madder at me
and will punish me.
I CAN behave and control myself so I WON'T NEED to get time-outs.
I KNOW that good things happen to good boys.
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
I LOVE to talk to people all the time.
Sometimes I don't get an answer.
I don't FORCE people to answer me because I know maybe they're
busy or they weren't paying attention.
When people don't answer me, I just forget about it and walk away.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO
Asking questions I know the answer to is NOT necessary.
When I do THAT, it just wastes everyone's time and gets them
upset.
I should ONLY ask questions if I'm trying to find out something I don't
already know.
I wouldn't want people to ask me question if they knew the answer
already.
There are lots of things I don't know, but WANT to know.
I can ask questions and find out.
I'm a big boy -- I don't have to ask questions I know the answers to!
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY
Sometimes I notice things that belong to other people.
If I want to touch these things, I KNOW I should ask if it's OK first.
I can only touch it IF they say it's OK, otherwise I better not!
If someone tells me NOT to, it's because they're afraid I might break it.
Big boys respect other people's property.
I'm a big boy and ALWAYS ask permission BEFORE I touch
someone's property.
5. CIRCLE TIME
Circle time is one of my FAVORITE activities at school.
I follow the teacher's instructions because I don't want to miss anything.
When I talk to other kids, I might miss something that the teacher is
saying.
When that happens, I might mess up circle time which will make
everyone mad at me.
I wouldn't want someone else to mess up circle time for ME!
I love circle time so much, that's why I always pay attention to the
teacher and never talk to the other kids.
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY
I LOVE playing with my friends!
When I'm playing a game or sport, I stay with my friends the
WHOLE time.
I don't leave them even if something else that's interesting is
happening nearby.
If I did that, I would ruin the game for everyone and nobody would
want to play with me.
I wouldn't someone to ruin the game for ME!
Friends are too important to lose, so I'll stick with them the
WHOLE time.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE
I learn a lot by watching and listening to other people, ESPECIALLY
other kids.
When I'm with other people, I pay close attention to what they're
saying and doing.
People LOVE being with someone who pays attention to them.
If I stop paying attention I might not learn new things.
I always think about what people say and do so I can learn.
8. PREDICTING
I love to experience NEW things.
I never can tell what's going to happen next.
It's more interesting to wait and see what will happen instead of
predicting.
Surprises are a LOT of fun!
When I try to guess what will happen next, it gets people mad.
I'm NOT going to predict anymore because I'd rather have
more surprises.
9. CALLING OUT
Sometimes someone I want to talk to is far away.
I know it's best to walk across the room to talk to them instead
of yelling.
Only people who don't CARE about other people yell across rooms.
I care about other people so I'll ALWAYS walk over to people I want
to talk to.
10. NOT LISTENING
People want to talk to me all the time.
When someone talks to me I stop what I'm doing and pay total
attention to them.
I would not like if someone did not listen to ME!
Only people who look and listen hear EVERYTHING there is to hear.
If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I won't HAVE
any friends.
Friends are VERY important, so I always pay attention when people
talk to me.
11. RULES
Grown-ups make rules to help me learn.
I'm too young to make up rules.
The rules I make up are ridiculous and make grown-ups mad.
I'll follow the rules grown-ups make and learn how to be a big boy.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS
I enjoy getting busy with things.
Even if I'm busy, when a grown-up calls me, I know it's time to stop
what I'm doing and go to them.
Boys who aren't good DON'T stop what they're doing and go to
grown-ups when they're called.
I'm GOOD so when a grown-up calls me, I stop what I'm doing and
walk over to them.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS
Sometimes I have to go someplace in a hurry.
No matter how much of a hurry I'm in, I know I HAVE to watch
where I'm going.
If I don't look where I'm going I could get hurt.
I always look where I'm going when I walk or run.
14. INTERRUPTING
People have lots of conversations with each other.
When I see people who are busy or in a conversation I let them finish
before I talk.
It's NEVER polite to interrupt -- I don't like when someone
interrupts ME!
If what I have to say is an emergency, I say "excuse me" and tap
them on the shoulder.
Sometimes a grown-up will tell me to wait anyway and I know I have
to listen or they'll get mad at me.
I love being a good boy so I NEVER interrupt anyone.
15. PERSONAL SPACE
I LOVE talking to my friends!
I NEVER get too close when I'm in a conversation.
Nobody likes to have someone in their face when they're having
a conversation.
I have LOTS of friends because I always give them their space when
I talk to them and they give me my space when they talk to me!
16. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
I enjoy having conversations with my friends.
My friends like me because I don't walk away from them when
they're talking to me.
I would never like it if people walked away from me when I talked.
I know it would hurt my feelings if they did that.
So I never walk away from them when they are speaking to me!
I stand still and pay full attention whenever I'm in a conversation.
I LOVE practicing to act grown-up so I never walk away from
conversations.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
I do what I'm told the first time without talking back.
When I DON'T listen the first time it's usually because I'm stuck.
When I get stuck, I can't learn and I frustrate everyone.
I'm VERY proud of myself when I listen the first time and the
grown-ups are proud also.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
I always work hard on everything I do.
I do the BEST job when I try REALLY hard and that makes everyone
proud, especially ME!
When I DON'T work hard and concentrate, I do terrible work & people
call me lazy.
When I work hard I ALWAYS do great work.
I LOVE doing my best!
19. I MUST TALK
Sometimes I feel like I can't STOP myself from talking!
When that happens, I give EVERYONE a headache!
Nobody likes someone who always has to talk.
I don't like people who are that way!
I like to only talk when I REALLY have something to say.
20. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
When someone calls my name, I know I better answer them
immediately.
That way they know I'm paying complete attention.
All kids and grown-ups like it when I pay attention to them.
When someone calls me and I don't answer the first time they
think I'm not friendly.
I am friendly, so it bothers me when people think I'm not.
I wouldn't like someone who didn't answer me when I called them.
I will always answer people the first time so everyone will know
how friendly I really am.
21. PACING
Sometimes I have to pay attention for a very long time.
Only a strong person can last a long time at something.
I know I'm strong but sometimes I forget to pace myself in the
beginning and I get tired later.
When I'm tired I have a hard time paying attention.
When I don't pay attention, other kids get asked the fun questions
and get to do interesting things while I end up getting bored.
I want to do interesting and exciting things all day so I know I have
to pace myself.
22. WEIRD THINGS
Weird things stop me from doing my best.
When I do something that's weird it gets in the way of everything
else.
When I do weird things I never get to do fun things or play with
other kids.
Playing with other kids and doing fun things is what I like the most.
It's just not worth it to do weird things anymore.
I better just control myself so I can do all the things I like.
23. WAITING YOUR TURN
Good things happen for people who know how to wait their turn.
When I wait for something I'm always happier when I get it.
When I don't wait patiently for my turn to come I get the people
in front of me very mad.
It's not fair to cut in front of someone when it's their turn.
I've seen a lot of people have fights because they were cut off by
someone who didn't wait their turn.
I don't like when people want to fight with me.
I'm going to keep everyone happy especially myself and always
wait my turn.
24. MY HANDS
Look, I'm controlling my hands!
I know when I control my hands I can concentrate on other things
that are much more important.
I can read books, play games or have a great conversation with
my friends.
When I think about my hands I can't think about anything else and
everyone thinks I'm strange.
That makes me sad.
I'd rather be happy so I keep controlling my hands.
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 1998 12:31:02 -0400 From: Melinda Krummerich <mkrum@CSI.COM> Subject: Re: Implementing Social Stories
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We've had great success by translating the stories into comic-book format, with appropriate magazine illustrations or photos, or really low-level cartoony drawings if we couldn't find anything else. My son LOVES these, and often reads them on his own. Does he follow them? The easier ones he has, and he'll use the phrases in the stories if we catch him doing something wrong (or right). (We lost our lead therapist, and for the old stories that still have her name in it, he's brought it to his new therapist's attention, and put the new name in!)
The key was grabbing the stories book whenever a situation came up. We'd go over the story again, talk him through what he did wrong, explain what he could have done instead, and quizzing him about his behavior. It takes a LOT of time (at least it has with us, and that's been tough for us, since Ize is usually so quick).
We're working on a couple of really difficult ones now, the biggest and toughest one is to keep him from obsessing on and chasing the cat (this is a HUGE, high-level stim for him, and our poor 14-yr-old cat is really beginning to resent it!) We're also starting a few for school, one to get him to say 'excuse me' or 'please don't sit/stand so close' instead of pushing or fighting, and another to keep him from doing a weird eye contact thing, where he really gets into another kid's face, and stares for attention. If you can imagine a social story DISCOURAGING eye contact! We already have one encouraging e.c., so we'll have to add a page on not looking too closely.
I'm thinking about starting a Social Token Board, too, so if he follows the right path for X number of ocassions (generally a week or longer), he can get a really good reinforcer (right now, that's the massively expensive Lego supersets).
Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 22:57:40 -0700
From: Lynette Rorer <lnett@FLASH.NET>
Subject: re :Social stories
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Responsibility for posts to this list lies entirely with the original author.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When we wrote social stories for Reagan we wrote them in the first
person, but they were very simple, or as simple as we could get away
with. They were not exactly the way Carol Gray intended them to be. I
did attend her talk on how to write them , but found that the "Sumlin
Style" social stories woeked better for us. We did use never and always,
because we wanted the stories to represent the ideal which we knew we
would be unlikely to get, but if she has it in her head that she does
not (never)do these things (the bad stuff) or that she always does the
good things, then she starts to formulate the attitude that she can do
what she should. We did always include a control statement which Carol
Gray says the child shoud come up with. This was impossible for Reagan
to do when we started social stories. Now I do ask her what she can do
to make some situations better or how can she change what she's doing to
make it better and she can do it , but we are passed, (for the most
part) needing to work things out through social stories.
We did include a lot of descriptive sentences and did try to keep the
directive statements down. Perspective statements were critical.
We always followed the reading of the story with a role play. The
stories themselves were not really the meat of the intervention, they
were just a package to present the problem and it's solution. Reagsn
could not gain from listening to a story the perspective she gained from
watching and participating in role. When we first did the role plays we
had her only watch . then we would do it agian and she would be one of
the characters. We had to feed her a lot of responses at first , she was
not capable of answering on her own. But as we worked she got to where
she could think for herself and answer correctly. This was when we would
see generalization, and know that we were successful. It really does
work so well! We give Megan and Jim Sumlin most all the credit for
getting Reagan going socially. We were making little to no progress up
till the time that they cam e on the me-list.
Sample social stories from our program:
Following Directions
At school the teacher tells us what to do. Listening to what the teacher
says and doing what she tells me to do is called "following directions".
In Kindergarten evreyone is big enough to follow directions. We all look
at the teacher when she is talking and we listen to what she says. We
always do what the teacher says to do. If we don't listen the teacher
gets frustrated, because she has to tell some of us more than one time.
I can listen to the teacher. I can remember what she says if I really
pay attention when she's talking. When I listen and follow directions I
do very good work. My teacher is proud of me when I do good work. She
thinks I am smart, and she is happy to have me in her class. I am smart,
and I want my teacher to know it!
My Mom and Dad are so proud of me when I do good work at school, I am
really proud when I listen and follow directions!
Using a big girl voice
When I was a baby I used a baby voice. Then I learned to talk really
well and now I am going to Kindergarten in two weeks! In kindergarten
everyone uses their best voice. My best voice is a big girl voice. Other
people know I am five years old and that I'm very smart when I use my
big girl voice. If I talk in a baby voice they think I am a baby. I
don't want to be a baby because babies can't go to kindergarten or play
with friends.
I feel proud when I catch myself using a baby voice and I fix it myself.
Everyone is proud of me when I remember NOT to use the baby voice!
We did several stories in each therapy session. Most of the time we used
several different stories to work on the same behavior. We probably
focused on no more than two or three different issues at one time. We
also tried hard to provide tons of DRO when we saw the behavior we
wanted, or when we saw the bad stuff lessening. For the body tensing
stim, (aka- the weird arm thing) it took lots and lots of DRO every
couple minutes at first and then we could fade back on it a bit, but
initially we had to reinforce quite frequently, almost obssess on
reinforcing the absence of it- this was hard but the stim is virtually
gone now and has been for some time. We occasionally see ghosts of it in
little modified weird body moves, but it is so easy to bring her
attention to it and then she stops. She knows why she shouldn't do it,
and the reasons are important to her- that is what has brought about the
success. We got there using role plays and social stories. Lynette